Last Week Was Lit XLII

Hi. We’re all about learning as we go here at What You Expect?—never forget the question mark beloved. And so I thought it’d be really cute to share my process with y’all on my IG story—@TwillTrousers. Not every topic makes the final cut but with 2020 being an absolute SHITSHOW on every level, I just needed y’all to understand just how crazy these weeks are. By the way, go check out Slamma 2 Gramma and Unapologetically Me. Support Black businesses and entrepreneurs. This is the only time I’m asking you nicely.

LWWL NEWBIES, READ THIS

Last Week Was Lit covers the spiciest happenings of the past week in a sometimes serious, mostly lighthearted way.

Instructions

  • There’s a headline with a link, you’re supposed to click that.
  • And there are typically two or three bullet points with my commentary. Like so.
  • Next is our Song of the Week Presented by Slamma 2 Gramma, your one-stop shop for vegan rolling papers—also check out the merch.
  • And, last but not least, is our Shout Out of the Week Presented by Unapologetically Me, living life freely, one juice at a time.
  • That’s it, tell your friends. And subscribe to the newsletter.

Usually we don’t applaud Black men losing their job, but there’s always an exception to the rule

  • The karma has an extra kick to it when it comes instantly.
  • He’s a doofus and no we ain’t supporting whatever new shit he on either.
  • I literally drop what I’m doing to jump in when the Twitter timeline is bashing him or Candace Ruckus, oh yeah don’t worry she’s in this Last Week Was Lit too.

Remember when Tiger King was a thing, a̶ ̶c̶e̶n̶t̶u̶r̶y̶ three months ago

  • Go watch Tiger King again
  • When we have less important things on our minds besides COVID, systemic racism and police brutality are we going to finally look into what happened to homegirl’s ex-husband?
  • I still can’t believe they let her do that Wingardium Leviosa to homie’s will. Gawd it’s GTBW

? + Birdman Hand Rub GIF

  • Long story, less long: Mikey Williams is considered to be the prize of the 2023 basketball recruitment class. Expounding on the Twitter post, Mikey shared his thoughts on potentially shaking up the college basketball scene.

Going to an HBCU wouldn’t be too bad…?— Mikey Williams (@619CONFIDENTIAL) June 2, 2020

I see COVID hopped on the Use Protection Remix real quick

  • I really need to know the story behind the casting call for the photo they used. And I have a lot of questions:
    • How’d they end up picking these two?
    • Did they have to bring their own masks?
    • Do they even know each other?
    • Wouldn’t the better photo be of them simulating sex while maintaining the proper six feet distancing guidelines?
  • I didn’t read the article, I mean we can’t even get people to agree to wear masks in public around strangers. Highly doubt, people are doing this. Sounds like Mr. Study needs to get outside.

The headline of the week award goes to…

  • A Spanish porn star named Nacho killed a dude in a mystic ritual where duke had to inhale psychedelic toad venom. This is the kind of news I want to her from Fox and CNN.
  • Why did this take 11 months to crack this case? I found Nacho’s Twitter in under a minute
  • Son having male genitalia candles had me crying. Best believe the What You Expect team will be receiving this as a gift from me.

LOL

Buffalo PD thinks their hurting people’s feelings by resigning from the Emergency Response Team

  • I couldn’t have thought of a better reaction to the news:

Is it time to uncancel Kanye????

  • In the hyperlink Kanye not only gave to the families of Ahmaud Arbery, George Floyd and Breonna Taylor but popped up in Chicago to join protestors. And Kanye did all this without doing all that shouting and ranting he was on.
  • So this might be fake, and if it is don’t tell me, BUT this might be the news I was waiting to hear to dust my old Kanye songs off my iTunes shelf and give them a listen again…

SHOUT OUTS OF THE WEEK PRESENTED BY UNAPOLOGETICALLY ME

Michael Thomas, et al.

NFL